عَنْ أُمِّ عطِيَّةَ رَضِيَ اللّهُ عَنْهَا قَالَتْ: نُهِينَا عنِ اتِّبَاعِ الجَنائزِ، وَلمْ يُعْزَمْ عَليْنَا» مُتَّفَقٌ عَلَيْهِ.
On the authority of Umm Atiyyah (may Allah be pleased with her) who said: "We were forbidden from following funerals, but it was not made binding upon us." Agreed upon (al-Bukhari and Muslim).
الشرح · explanation
ولم يُعزم علينا: ولَمْ يُشدَّدْ علينا في النَّهْي كما يُشدَّدُ في المُحَرَّمَاتِ.
"But it was not made binding upon us (wa-lam yu'zam alayna)": the prohibition was not enforced strictly upon us as is done with forbidden matters.
الدروس · lessons
كراهية اتباع النساء للجنائز، وهذا قول جمهور العلماء، أما الصلاة على الميت فإنها مشروعة لهن كالرجال. قيل من الحِكم في منعهنَّ جزعهن وقلة صبرهنّ.
The disliked nature of women following funerals; this is the view of the majority of scholars. As for praying over the deceased, it is prescribed for them as it is for men. It has been said that among the wisdoms in preventing them is their impatience and lack of endurance.